WHOOT!!

Hey all! I don't have much time to update right now, as I am heading up to Sedona in an hour, but I just wanted to let you all know that the follow up interview we AMAZING! I really really think that this job is mine.

I interviewed with two other ladies, and they were sooo impressed with me! They even told me so! Haha! They kept hinting at things like "Well, when you start with you be able to handle {blank}" and things like that. I pray to God on my KNEES that I get this job. I think it would be so wonderful for me and Lyla both.

With this job, I should be able to be out on my own by this summer! I will finally be able to take care of myself, and my daughter. I can't wait! Also, I'm testing for my GED soon! Yay! I have been studying like a mad woman, and I am yawning because I already know this stuff! Haha! I am gonna rock that test!

Anywho, hope you all are having a blessed Thursday. I am off to go and watch some high school volleyball! Pictures of beautiful Sedona will also be coming! :) Toodles!

P.S. Don't forget to check out my photo blog. ;)

I HAVE A FOLLOW-UP INTERVIEW TOMORROW!!!

Yep, you heard it right peeps! I have another interview with that medical office position I applied for about a month back! :D I am so excited! The lady actually called ME and set up another interview! They must really be interested if they called me back!

I just have this deep feeling in my heart that this job is going to work out. I am not basing my whole life on it working out, but I have a strong feeling that God is going to make this job happen. I do hope so, because I REALLY need a job!!!

I haven't been able to get out job hunting these last two weeks. Things have been really busy! Like CRAZY busy! I haven't even really had time to blog! LOL! But alas, here I am finally, updating you all. Dontcha just love me? LOL!

Well, I suppose that's it. There really isn't much else to say today. Haha! Oh, if you didn't get a chance to check out my I ♥ Faces post yesterday at my new blog, then click HERE to do so. :) Please follow if you feel led. :) And remember, it is still a working progress. In fact, I need to go and work on it now.

Toodles!

A VERY DISCOURAGING DAY

Today I traveled an hour outside of town to look for work. I went to about a million places. Here is the run-down of what happened:

• Target: Not hiring.
• Barnes & Nobel: Not hiring.
• Macayo's, TGIFriday's, Carraba's: Not hiring busers.
• Paridise Bakery: Told me to apply online.
• Kohls: Filled out application, but the lady was really rude. Doesn't look promising.
• Michael's & Office Max: Told me to apply online.
• Sprouts: Not hiring.
• All 3 of the Starbucks': Not hiring, but I did leave my resume.
• Jack-in-the-Box: Not hiring
• IHOP: Not hiring busers
• Best Buy: Told me that they would review my online application.
• Lowes & Home Depot: Have to be 18 to work there.

My day was VERY discouraging. :( It was not good, but I am keeping my head held high. I did have a few nice things happen though. While at Target, I used Lyla's $50 gift card to buy her some cute wintery clothes. :) So adorable! I also got my GED study book while at B&N. I took the first practice test and did pretty good {with the exception of math.}

Tomorrow's agenda: sitting at home, filling out all the online applications I can. Then Wednesday, its off to the mall an hour away to search once more. Ugh! Please pray that I get a freaking job!!!

FOR THE LOVE OF CHANGING MY MIND

You people honestly must think I am schizo or something. Haha! I have changed my mind YET again. I was thinking long and hard today about the decision to go back to school. I just can't do it. I do not see me doing school for another 4 months when I could be out working, getting my GED, and going to college. I want to be independent. I want to be able to live on my own come this summer. I DO NOT want to be at that crappy school that I hate any longer.

I know that a lot of you are huge school advocates, but for me, this just isn't an option anymore, and I don't want it to be. My family and I are sticking to our choices. I have accepted that my childhood is over, so there is no need to keep trying to get it back. I don't want it back to be honest. I want to start my life. I want to live on my own, make my own money, and eventually start college classes that will help me reach my goal one day.

I am ready for my life to start, and going back to school is only going to postpone it. I do not want that. I feel like I have been so wishy-washy, and I am sorry for that. It honestly makes my head hurt! Haha! I swear, this is my choice, and I am sticking to it!

So, come Monday, I am off in search of a job again. Hopefully by December/January, I will have that job in the medical office. By October I am going to have my GED, and I am still pushing Matthew for child support. I pray that by the Summer of 2010, Lyla and I will have an apartment in town. Just the two of us. That is my goal, and I am going to do everything in my power to accomplish it.

Thank you, my friends, for listening to this crazy blogger. I hope your head doesn't hurt as much as mine. :P But I will leave you with this good news: Tomorrow I have my first ever PHOTO SHOOT!!! OMGosh! And its not just any old photo shoot, I am actually getting paid! Haha! YES!! I have a few more shoots lined up in the coming weeks as well. These are the kinds of things I want to do, not be in boring old school. I really am "to cool for school." And don't you forget it!

Love you all! Thanks for listening to me once again!

AND THE SAGA CONTINUES...

My life has switched gears yet again. Today I officially turned in my withdrawl from school. While waiting for the paperwork to be filed, one of the counselors came up to me with some surprising news.

Long story short, I am back in school. Yay! I will be going to the Alternative School three hours a week {at which time I can bring Lyla with me}, and the rest of the work I will be doing on the computer at home. I will be graduating this December. It works out AMAZINGLY with the job I mentioned a few posts back. This is an answer to my prayers. God really does work things out.

So as of right now, I am going to be in school during the next few months. I think the job thing is going to be on hold, but we will see. I know for sure I will be starting the job I interviewed for in January, so the timing is PERFECT!

I pray this all works out. I really did not want to drop out, but I will do what I have to do to provide for my daughter. Now I can be home with her, which saves TONS of money. I get to walk with my class, and hold my diploma in my hand. God is good. Be praying this plan works out.

I HAD AN INTERVIEW THIS MORNING

Last night I got a text message from one of the mom's who's daughter is on my sister's volleyball team. It simply said this: "Give me a call. I have a job op for you." Needless to say, I called her right then and there.

Once I got a hold of her, she explained to me that a new medical office just opened up right across the hall from her, and that they were looking for a potential Admin Assistant. She had gone over there yesterday and pretty much bragged about me. The woman (Michelle) told my her to tell me that she would be happy to interview me today! I almost jumped for joy when I heard this.

So this morning I dropped Lyla off at her baby sitter's, then headed on over to the new office. All I can say is "wow." God surely does answer prayers. Michelle was sooooo friendly, and super professional. She asked me all kinds of questions and was very impressed with me. I had {thankfully} typed up a resume last week, so that was good to go.

Basically she said that I was hired. She was very impressed at my professional outlook, and my youthfulness. She let me know that she had to, by courtesy, let a few of the other ladies in there main office apply for the job, but she isn't confident that they will want it. I hopefully be starting this job sometime around December or January depending on how fast they can get up and running. So in the mean time, I need to find another job. If this one doesn't pan out, then I will always have a backup.

I am so very happy to share this good news with you all today. I just have a feeling that this is all going to work out. I have faith that God is going to get me into that office, and that I am going to build a nice career out of it for a while. I am very very excited. I still ask for prayer, though, since there is a small chance that this will not work out, but I am going to trust that it will.

JOB UPDATE

Hello everyone! Whoot! I have a few minutes here to post somewhat of an update. :) As you can probably tell from my writing, I am doing much better than the last time I "talked" to you all. I have had a few days to sort some things out, and truth be told, I am kind of excited about starting this new independant life. Yeah, I really wish I could walk down the aisle with my class, but you know what, in the grand scheme of things, it doesn't really matter all the much. I will still have a diploma, just not a HIGH SCHOOL diploma. Big whoop.



Anyways, I went off for a few hours job hunting today. Over the past two days I have been applying everywhere I could think of online. My main place being at Safeway {I worked there when I was 15 before I got preg} So I actually went into the store today to talk with one of the managers. He was very pleased that I was available anyday anytime. He took my number and said he would give me a call as soon as he passed my info onto the head boss. :) Sounds promising to me.



Just in case that falls through, I also applied at a few other places. I applied at Bashas', McDonalds, and Best Buy. I will be going out again looking for more places to apply once my car is fixed. I am actually feeling really good about this. :) I think everything is going to work out. Though, there is one thing...



Okay, so, long story short, Matt's {baby daddy} girlfriend, Ashley works at Safeway. Doh!!! Yeah, she and Matt have been together since I was about three months pregnant. He was all but stalking me when I broke up with him almost two years ago. Saying "we will get married" and "I love you so much" blah blah blah. I fell for it everytime, but once word got out I was pregnant, he ran the other way. Now its almost been two years, and him and his precious skank little beauty are supposidly getting married. {Good riddance I say} She can help pay for Lyla's child support.



Okay, I am just ranting now, but honestly, she is like class 10 white trash. It actually makes me feel better to know that he downgraded. And he, by the way, turned into a major tool. Gauged his ears, mohawked his hair, bleached it blonde; ya know, the whole nine yards. And this guy is 20!! Ugh! >.<



So anyways, that's my update for the day. Sorry if that made absolutely no sense, I just really needed to vent a little. Also, I hope I don't get in trouble for this buuuut...wanna see a picture of Ashley and Matt? Okay, I will show you. You decide if he downgraded or not. First I will show you a picture of Matthew {mind you, he really was cute when I dated him}. Then comes the picture of Ashley. Enjoy.

They are perfect for each other huh?? Oh they are going to make such beautiful babies!!! NOT!!! I am sooo glad Lyla looks like me. Seriously. Ugh, sorry for all the meaness. Most people don't see this side of me, but seeing her just provokes so many angry memories. Its okay, "vengence is mine" Thus sayeth the Lord. >:}

REALITY CHECK

Life. It comes at you fast. I think every normal human being can attest to that. For some reason, I have been living in this delusion that life doesn't effect me. I can beat it. I can just squeeze by without the slightest bit of responsibility. NEWS FLASH: I can't.

Yesterday was one of the biggest turning points in my life. This car accident has really shown me and my family some things. The main one being: I cannot be a teenager any longer. I am a mother. 21 months ago I became a mother. I became a mother the day I found out I was pregnant. Goodbye teenager hood, hello mommy hood.

My family and I have recently made some VERY tough decisions. Some that I almost don't want to talk about. Some that are leaving me feeling raw and helpless. On the flip side, I am excited. I know that through these tough decisions, I will start to feel more independent. I will truly be a mother to my daughter, 100%.

Lyla is my life. I take care of her every day. I am her rock. I am her mommy. But that's all I am. I am not her provider. As much as I want to be, I am not. You see, I am only raising Lyla half way. My parents pay for everything. I do not have a job. Every single thing that Lyla needs financially, comes from them. That is one thing that is going to change.

The first step to achieving Independence is in the form of me getting a job. I am dropping out of school. Yes, I thought I would be a different sort of teen mom. One that finishes school and walks with her class. Well, guess what, I AM A TEEN MOM!! I am going to do what I have too, to provide for Lyla. Yesterday was my official last day on a high school campus. I am grieving this tremendously, but I know in my heart it is the right thing.

Come Monday, when I get my car back, I am off job hunting. I will take the very first job that comes my way. Once I finally do find a good job, I am going to get my GED. I am going to study hard, and pass it. Once I get my GED, and turn 18, I will be able to get a much more rewarding job. Will I be making 30 bucks an hour? Probably not. But at least I will be providing for my daughter financially.

Lastly, I am pushing Lyla's father for child support. Matthew helped create our beautiful daughter, and he needs to help out too. It shouldn't have to be my parents footing the bill while I run around and play teenager. Nope, I am a mommy, 100%, and that's what I want to be. I hate high school anyways!! Matthew is going to help with our daughter. He needs to help with her. With his child support, and my new job, I will be able to provide for my daughter. Yeah, its gonna be really hard. Yeah, I am probably going to cry a lot. Yeah, I am going to miss out on so many thing. But what I will receive from this is so much greater than anything I can even fathom. I know God knows what He is doing, and I am going to trust Him with my whole heart.

With all that being said, I may not be posting in here as much as I usually do. One of my problems is that I have a major Internet addiction. I will admit it, I LOVE THE COMPUTER! I want to eventually go to college and have a career with computers, but that isn't my focus right now. This computer isn't mine, it is my parents'. I do not know if I will be allowed to use it much, or if at all. I hope that I will be able to continue my blogging, and recording of my life with Lyla, but right now, I am not making that my priority. If all of my dear followers feel the need to remove my blog from your list, then I very much understand, but I hope you will stick in this with me.

I love sharing my story, and documenting my life. I hope to continue to do that through these difficult and stressful times coming. Please please pray for me. I could use all the prayer I can get! Thank you all for listening, and I hope I will be back soon to update you all. God bless.